


My Sweet Little Dude

by DawnVanessa15



Category: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Bgrim8633, Crossover, Gen, M/M, Other, Past Relationship(s), Soul Bond, beta read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-27
Updated: 2014-02-27
Packaged: 2018-01-14 00:15:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1245583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DawnVanessa15/pseuds/DawnVanessa15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mikey Way in the ending of the tour and why the stars seem to hate him. Gerard on the other hand already knows why but doesn't want to share. Gerard is selfish like that in this life and in the past one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Sweet Little Dude

**Author's Note:**

> This story was inspired by snarkydame's story "Love is a binding force" but it's in Mikey's side of things.

My Sweet Little Dude

The night was clear and full of dazzling stars, the sound of the main band keeping the crowds pump up. My thoughts had been in turmoil ever since my dark prince had left me. I would like to think that his abandonment at first didn't hurt since at the time she, Alicia, took my time but now I feel a little numb. I had left her and not once had regretted it and spent my full time in my brother's band. Speaking of which, I had been standing in a little dark corner watching the fans getting excited, also admiring and hating the stars all the same.

My sweet little dude with the essence of a past derange and psychic self and now a reckless bass player. I regret to think that Pete doesn't make things any easier on me and that sometimes is hard to follow where his wondering thoughts or the stars often lead him.

The stars are such treacherous things that whispered bad things to you my sweet little dude, my Pete. Of course at the time that he left me I was beginning to think about Alicia and she had sparked my curiosity. Did the stars tell you about her, that's why you left me so I can what, pursue her and in the end finding out she had been nothing more but a fizzle. It's been a month since he had left me. Can't he feel how much he hurt me when he left me?

The mass of fans didn't let the outdoor stadium even get that cold. I was on stage with just a t-shirt and some shorts that were a little below the knee, I am not feeling the cold. As I look at the crows of fans I noticed a little fight had begun but was quickly taken care of by security. I had wondered thinking about that fight, wondered about the bruises and spilt blood they had left if my sweet little dude is or will be engage in a fight.

I can't believe that I had been foolish enough to listen to him and to let him go. I should had ignored his mad ramblings that I belonged to somebody else. But at the same time Pete is an unreasonable person that takes risks and is unable to take properly care of himself. I wonder what he's doing, is he still listening to his mad ramblings, still taking unreasonable risks. 

"This is the last show, you're still thinking about him aren't you," my brother Gee hands me a bottle of water. Gerard was wearing his usual get up and make up. My brother's dream or memories making it impossible to distinguish between the now and then. I had been a little surprised by the confidence and that old knowledge that the dreams had left my older brother with. As I look at him and realize the subtlety of his unsaid message.

"It doesn't matter what I think now and even before he left me he had thought I had left him. Sure I had been a fool to allow his mad ramblings to get to me but I was finally beginning to lose my patience with him," I huff with some annoyance. I had begun to lose my patient with him but not my love. I am sure of my love just as I am sure that I am standing on this stage.

"Well you can be happy for him and his new found sunshine ..." He didn't finished it but just that thought of that crazy little man made me angry. Gerard walked away leaving me to my thoughts. I hadn't felt him in a while was it because I had pursued this chick. I wonder if Gabe is already filling my dark prince senses. 

I can't seem to help myself when it comes to Pete. I can't stop thinking about him, his silky hair, his innocent face and that voice of his that made me shiver. I quickly take a drink from my hidden flask of my sleeveless jacket. I can't let my band mates think that I'm an alcoholic and simply let it numb my senses for tonight. It's such a cold comfort, this temporary relief, but in spite of this the memories keep a burning fire inside of me.

I think that I had always loved him or even the fact that I had always been drawn to him like in our previous life. I sometimes feel like a moth drawn to the fire of his intensity. The most unfortunate part is that Pete would always keep me guessing on where I would always stand. All of his playful games and charming subtleties that I could learn the rules, and how to play them well, but as quickly as I mastered the game, my sweet little prince had moved on to another game with different rules.

Don't get me wrong, I still love him and my love doesn't go away just because of a whim or what the stars had foretold him. I am still human and can still make mistakes in spite of my love for him. Love doesn't change either when you can't follow his simple lack of common sense. This is truly and deeply a sad sort of affairs for me because I still feel the same way about him now. I still care if he has enough sleep, or has eaten enough as I did when I just wanted to buried myself so deep into that tight heat that he would had felt it for weeks. 

I wonder if he is still drinking copious amount of alcohol as the remaining drops of my own alcohol fill my mouth. I mean I have to face the cold and hard facts, my sweet little dude isn't capable of taking care of himself, period. He needs someone to look after him and right now I don't know if I should feel mad or grateful that somebody is taking care of him. My unstable little Pete, so I have a thing for unreliable and unstable sweet little dudes, so what. Alicia hadn't even inspired any kind of commitment, but I had to admit to kind of neglecting Pete along the way. I hadn't realized how much my brother's band had gotten in the way and now were torn apart. The worst part is that I also hadn't how much a part of me he had become until his final words had left me feeling cold.

"I have to find my own sunshine and you my sweet poet your own side of the moon. I can already hear the stars, smell her perfume and you will soon be covered with her." This had told me that we we're over and he was leaving me. The only question left unsaid was if I could handle it now and not then. Then I had been cheaply entertained by this one girl, this Alicia. Now all I can think is that I can't handle it now and I can't take the pressure. I had liked to pretend that back then when he first had left that I knew what I had been doing. But I couldn't keep lying to myself now and deep down I was fooling myself into thinking that I didn't needed him.

For an instant, I'm actually feeling kind of sorry I've done it. I'm actually sorry that I led on this Alicia girl and maybe Pete had been partially right. I've neglected him for just some cheap entertainment, and now I know that deep inside I shouldn't have or heck even had listened to his insane ideas. I know what it's like to feel abandoned and it feels all sort of wrong. I was wrong before; right now, knowing that after all this time he's left me, this is the most horrible feeling in my life.

No, scratch that it isn't the worst feeling ... I still hate Gabe Saporta ... now that I think about it ... I hate him too and to tell you the truth, it feels damn good. I don't have to worry about anything that has to do with him, or what he feels, sees or cares. It's all about me again, a way it hasn't been since I can't even remember, and I like getting my turn to be in control and have it be about what I feel and see and care. I don't need another person around taking all of my quality time I have with music, my likes and my wants. I'm a very busy musician and helping my brother's dream and shit. It's difficult to get a meeting with me since MCR is touring and band practice. I would like to think that what I am doing with Gerard is helping the world or so it's what my loving brother tells me.

I don't need him at all and kicking the now empty bottle of water hurtling from where I stand and me tottering about. I begin to laugh as I try to figure out if it's actually me this time or a small quake, but the sound is raspy even to my own ears. It had been too much, emotions, thoughts and bloody tears choking down in my throat. Drown your sorrows they say, too bad that saline still manages to float on top of bourbon.

My ever loving brother of mine had made sketches, all those leaflets of my sweet little dude. Fucking sketches of that asshole who is probably still shoving the pulsating organ of my heart onto hot coals for good measure. But looking at his illustration quickly made me think, Pete might be the same, that boy with little regard to himself. The one who knew me; still all hot embers and butterfly kisses. So I give him a longer glance and he's not perfect since he left me, I rip it in half, he isn't graceful. I rip and wonder if Gabe takes care of your scrapes. I wonder if Gabe takes notice of your wondering mind and how you let your impulses take the better of you.

Well then in that case, then Gabe Saporta can have you all to himself. Let Gabe tell my little sweet dude that he's beautiful both on the inside and out. I wonder if Gabe already knows about your wondering mind and your peculiar talks to random things. I bet that Gabe doesn't need to worry what the stars, the moon or anything else they says to you, my sweet little dude. I relinquish the rights to have him find Pete new pets and not mind that often he needs help with the most mundane of things like self preservation, eating, sleeping or even the fucking weather. Gabe fucking Saporta, he can protect Pete, cause there's no fucking way that he could do it by himself and is a true fact. 

I have the pieces of his drawing in my hand and wondered about Pete's own being and how torn and tattered it is now. I also have to wonder about the ones that had been ripped in my chest caused by his abandonment. I feel like both the physical and the metaphorical one match oh so well in my state of mind. How fucking hysterical with the fates or even destiny I suppose. I know that he is a fucking asshole for leaving me but I want him back so bad that it burns. I sometimes wonder if Pete is already incorporating a little of his past Dru madness in this new life. If I am also incorporating a little bit of the old William the bloody into myself since all I want to right now is eviscerate Gabe Saporta.

the end


End file.
